'Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows' has absolutely zero chill

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows is an insane fever dream of explosions, talking turtles and WTF plotlines. 

And if it wasn't rated PG-13, kids would totally love it. 

For the lax parents out there, most of the movie is probably fine for older children who can handle heavy action — but only if you want to hear them repeat phrases like "son of a bitch" that are casually thrown around. 

Plus, Megan Fox is outfitted in a scandalous schoolgirl costume halfway through...

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