Great news for the environment: Wind power is the cheapest it's been in a long time.

Coming soon to an open field near you

Wind turbines.

Focus on the turbine. Not the cows. Photo by Dirk Ingo Franke/Wikimedia Commons.

They're flawless.

Just stick one of these puppies outside, wait for the atmospheric pressure to get nice and different, and bam. Free electricity.

What other thing can do that?

Oh, that's right. No other thing.

It is a scientifically proven fact that wind turbines are cooler than you.

They're cooler than you're friend Jed,...

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